When last night’s episode of Survivor began … Oh My God, I was so worried. After last week’s elimination of Anna, I had kind of resigned myself to the prospect of watching one member of the Beauty Tribe get voted out after another. I looked at the numbers and I naturally assumed that the Brain Tribe would dominate the rest of the game.
Bleh! I thought, do I really want to watch a season dominated by the ugliest and most boring people in the game? Do I want to spend the next month listening to Debbie cackle about how she’s the ring leader, especially when it probably means that final Survivor will turn out to be some boring nonentity like Aubry?
For the record, I do like Neal and his bowties. He’s the only member of the Brain Tribe who I would voluntarily hang out with because you can tell that he’s an eccentric and that a conversation with him would at least be interesting. Otherwise, consider this about the so-called smartest people on the beach:
Debbie, I am convinced, is the Blair Witch. Last night, she declared that Nick, the least attractive member of the old Beauty Tribe, was an adonis. She also bragged about being a former model. Debbie, sweetie — taking a selfie of yourself naked in a gas station bathroom is not the same thing as being a model.
Joe is a former FBI negotiator. Joe is also a total and complete moron. Every time Joe starts to speak, I find myself thankful that he is no longer with the FBI and, presumably, has no role to play in keeping America safe. Last night, several heavy blocks literally fell on his head during the immunity challenge but he says that they didn’t hurt. That’s the advantage of having an empty skull.
Aubry is a basket case. In high school and college, we all had a boring and needy friend like Aubry and, for the most part, we were always glad when she either transferred to another school or ended up having to take a semester off to recover from having a nervous breakdown.
And then there’s Peter. Peter is the incredibly arrogant ER doctor who never knows when to shut up. Peter has been scheming and conniving since the game began and, even more stupidly, he insists on bragging about it at Tribal Council. Peter has been an obvious target since day one but it hasn’t made any strategic sense to vote him out.
But, last night, that’s exactly what happened.
The Gondol Tribe went to Tribal Council for a second time and, at first, it looked like poor Julia was going to be voted out. But once again, Peter proved himself to be his own worse enemy. First off, he openly considered betraying Joe and Aubry. Then he talked about doing so at Tribal. And, as usual, Peter managed to talk himself into a corner.
And this time, it finally came back to bite him on the ass. Basketcase Aubry heard that Peter was looking to get rid of her and joined with Scot, Tae, and Julia and voted Peter off. It was literally a last minute decision. It was so last minute that Aubry originally wrote down Julia’s name before then drawing a line through it and instead voting for Peter.
Peter is gone, which is great for the Beauty Tribe though it probably won’t work out well for Aubry. Next week, the two tribes are going to merge and it’ll be interesting to see if anyone’s going to be willing to trust Aubry. Will Aubry be able to get back into her old alliance or will she end up at the bottom of a new alliance? Is Aubry destined to be the Cochran of this season?
With Peter gone and the merge approaching, here’s who is left in the game:
Basketcase Aubry (Brains)
Empty-headed Joe (Brains)
Bowtie Neal (Brains)
Adorable Tai (Beauty)
Stinky Jason (Brawn)
Witchy Debbie (Brain)
That’s 4 from the Brains, 4 From the Beauty, and 3 members of Brawn. Personally, I would love to see the Brain and Beauty Tribes team up to pick off the Brawn people one-by-one. The sooner Stinky Jason leaves the better!
I’ll keep my fingers crossed.
Have a great weekend!